3 Idiots' Guide to Education and the Indian Criteria for Success

I recently watched the movie '3 Idiots', and like everyone has been saying, it is indeed a great movie. It manages to deliver a great social message while being entertaining too.

However, the end for me was bit of a let down.

I was under the impression that in the end they would show Amir Khan as a school teacher and nothing more. And the message would be, even though the obnoxious kid from college, Ramalinga I think was his name, was rich with a position in the corporate world, Amir Khan would be portrayed as a more successful person because he was doing something that he liked and he was making a difference by teaching the kids of some village in Ladakh.

For Amir Khan, being rich and famous was not his goal in life. He defined success differently. And that would have made the message complete. Education for education sake and then use that education to make a difference in the world, even if you had to lead a simple life doing it.

But unfortunately, it seems that is not a message people are willing to hear. Amir Khan's attitude, or 'train track' as they called it in the movie, towards education can only be accepted if it leads to riches and fame. Because, apparently, that is the only criteria for success. If you have it, you're successful and if you don't, then you're not.

A warning to those who maybe willing to try out Amir Khan's approach to life.

You might learn more and even be happier, but the probability of you becoming rich and famous are still very low. I do believe there is a greater chance you might become really rich and famous if you follow his approach compared to the traditional approach. But the chances for failure, in terms of fame and money, are still very high. Even more so than the traditional approach.

So if you do follow his lead, you should be prepared for the likelihood of failure.

Take it from someone who has already tried it.

Goatty-back Ride

This is one of those pictures where you go: I see it, but I don't believe it.

Via India - Travels in my nightie:

Apparently that's a goat on the back of some guy on a bicycle. I don't believe it's in India. Looks like some African country.

Ask not what Gibran said; ask what Kennedy said

In 1925, an Arab American asked Arabs of the Middle-East:

"There are today, in the Middle East, two men: one of the past and one of the future. Which one are you? Come close, let me look at you and let me be assured by your appearance and your conduct if you are one of those coming into the light or going into the darkness. Come and tell me who and what are you?

Are you a politician asking what your country can do for you, or a zealous one asking what you can do for your country?

If you are the first, then you are a parasite; if the second, then you are an oasis in a desert." [Khalil Gibran; 'The New Frontier', 1925]

Then later in 1961 an Irish American politician told his fellow countrymen:

"Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country." [John F. Kennedy; Presidential inauguration speech, 1961]

The ironic insult was too much for the people of America to take, so they killed the politician.

Why did the cat cross the road?

The other day I was in a cab, and on our way, a grey colored cat crossed our path. The taxi driver immediately stopped the car. I was sitting right next to him and I wondered what had happened? Why did the guy stop in the middle of the road when there was nothing blocking our way?

I looked over and noticed he had a worrisome expression on his face. He started to look in the rear view mirror and then started to put the car in reverse without saying a word to me why he had stopped.

So I ask the driver, 'kya bhai, what the frak is going on with you? Why did you stop, and why the hell are you backing up?'

He tells me, a cat just crossed our path.

And I'm like, WTF?! You can't be serious about this!

Now I'm sitting there bewildered, thinking to myself -- Isn't the cat crossing your path a western superstition? How does this poor Hindu cab driver in India even know about it? And even if he does know about it, why does he even believe in it?

Now I didn't think it would be appropriate or even worth the effort to tell him how stupid he sounds and looks saying that.

So instead of telling him to stop acting crazy and just move on, I say to him -- hoping to convince him by his own logic -- 'But the cat wasn't even black. It was grey with some sort of stripes on it. And from what I've read in the Scientific American, it only works if it's a black cat. So I believe we're safe on this one.'

He retorts with a grim look on his face, 'No sir jee, you are misinformed. It's all cats. Color doesn't make a difference.'

Knowing I just got owned, I go, 'Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't aware of that. Thanks for the info. though.'

Realizing there was no way of convincing him otherwise, I shut up, while he turned the car around and took a longer way to where I wanted to go.

If you're wondering what's the moral of the story, then know this: Cats can become pissy little bitches once they get behind the wheel. We should take away their license to drive.

Amir Khan Brings Chetan Bhagat Down Five Notches

I'm so glad Chetan Bhagat has chosen to pick a fight with Amir Khan on his movie '3 idiots', which is supposed to be loosely based on Chetan's book, 'Five point someone'.

Those who are not aware of the fracas between the two, let me bring you up to speed.

Even though the movie '3 Idiots' credits Chetan Bhagat for the idea of the movie, Chetan thinks the movie should have his name as the movie scriptwriter instead of Abhijat because in his opinion, the entire storyline to the movie is from his book FPS. However, movie makers disagree. And this has caused Chetan Bhagat to go all Bhagat Singh on Amir Khan and the producer, Vidhu Vinod's ass.

Now as far as I'm concerned I couldn't care less what the fact of the matter is. I simply want someone to knock Chetan Bhagat down a few notches. Someone needs to bring that five point idiot back to earth. And I believe Amir Khan is the right man for the job.

I'm sure for someone who thinks he is the voice of Indian youth, Chetan must be deluded enough to take on the Titan of the Indian entertainment industry, Amir Khan.

Boy is he in for a rude awakening.

Amir Khan is quoted to have said:

Recalling that Bhagat had once admitted to him that the film was very different from the book, Khan said, "Now the film has become successful so he is trying to get some publicity. It's very unfortunate".

Read more of what Amir Khan had to say on the matter here.


Addendum Jan. 07, 2010:

Just as I had expected, Chetan Bhagat has apologized to Amir Khan and all his fans for being such a douchy pissy little bitch ungrateful bastard; according to the Times of India on 06/01/2010. Read the entire article here.

Zardari and Karzai Express their Love for Hilary in a Song

If you're not already aware of The Gregory Brothers on youtube, then know that they are an internet phenom. with their hilarious songs about the news using the digital Autotune music technology made famous by the rapper, T-pain. [To learn more about Autotune watch this video.]

Every track I've heard of theirs is a mark of absolute genius. The guys are really talented.

Of all the tracks I've heard, the one embedded below is the funniest. Afghanistani President Hamid Karzai and the Pakistani President Asif Ali Zardari express their love for Hilary Clinton at a press conference. Lyrics to that part of the song are priceless!! I haven't laughed so hard in a very long time.

Forward to 1:32 of the video and laugh your ass off.




Lyrics to the song.

H.Karzai: We'll be friends with you
A.Zardari: And bff with you
Main Damies with you
HK: And colleagues with you
AZ: I'll be in your crew
HK: I'll be in yours, too
AZ: Jumpin rope with you
HK: Playin Donkey Kong with you
AZ: Hatchin plans with you
HK/AZ: invade Tajikistan with you
H.CLinton: We do not believe either Afghanistan or Pakistan
Can achieve lasting progress
Without the full participation of all of your citizens
Including women and girls
AZ: Having a barbecue
HK: Grilling a goat with you
AZ: Grilling terrorists, too
HK: Getting matching tattoos
HC: The rights of women must be respected and protect--
AZ: --Picking flowers with you
HK: Hot showers with you
AZ: Falling in love with you
HK: Nude at the zoo
AZ/HK: Making memories at the pottery wheel, rubbing clay on you all afternoon

Google India is a... Bigot, Crazy SOB, Clairvoyant

Inspired by a post on Chapati Mystery, I thought I'd do a similar search on Pakistan and see what searches would Google India suggest if I wrote "Pakistan is" in the search field.

The suggested search results are just too funny not to share.

[Click on image to see an enlarged version.]

Then I thought, okay, why not try the same thing with India and see what does Google India think of India. So I typed in 'India is".

I think it is safe to say the results are a little biased. HaHa!!

 

The South-Asian American Web Community and the Rise of HijabMan

During my early years on the internet, back at the start of this decade, around the time when 9/11 was still an unsolved mystery. I had stumbled upon an active -- yet still in its nascent stage -- a vibrant community of young American Muslims of South-Asian origin on the world wide web. The online community consisted of both American born and newly arrived immigrants like myself.

Back then Blogs and Blogging was still a word most of us were unfamiliar with. Our web 2.0 experience were based on easy to host discussion forums. There were a couple of forums really popular. Their names slip my mind today but I do remember one of them, which I considered to be the most popular, was hosted and run by a bunch of New Jersey Indian-American college girls.

And on these forums I had come across a user by the name of Hijabman. The name was back then and still is, confusing. I still don't know what meaning or message the name is meant to convey.

Anyways, he was among the most active, and needless to say, among the more popular users on these forums.

I personally never payed much attention to him and as a consequence, I guess, my interaction with him on these forums were negligible. However, I am certain of the fact that we did run into each other a few times and responded to each others posts in an on-going discussion thread.

In my newly found community, the biggest event of the year, where we got to meet and talk to each other in person was the annual convention of an American Muslims organization called the Islamic Society of North America, or ISNA for short.

It was like the American Muslim equivalent of Woodstock, as strange as that may sound.

ISNA was one topic on these discussion forums which never got old. However, unfortunately, for a very long time, I could not be a part of any of these discussion because I lived down South in Alabama and ISNA always held their conventions up in the North. An undertaking, at lest for me back then, was nothing short of venturing beyond the uncharted mid-west, as it was for the early American settlers. 

After several years, when blogging was just starting to catch-on in our little community, I got the means, the opportunity and the courage to set off on an epic voyage to a place called Chicago, to attend  ISNA's annual convention of '03.

At this convention, I got to see (not meet) many of the famous and popular personalities in the American Muslim community about which I had seen and read about online over the years. And among these some well-known online personalities however, I also got to see a not-so-famous, yet quite well-known in my small little online community, a person who went by the name of Hijabman.

At the convention, as I was walking around in the Bazaar section of the convention, in one of the stalls, I see a young bearded guy with a topi on, if I recall correctly, standing on a table calling out to passers by, trying to sell his humorously sloganed t-shirts.

I don't recall how I knew it was Hijabman back then, but I knew it was him.

Seeing me watching him from some distance away with a smile on my face, he called on me gesturing and saying something along the lines of: 'You know, I know, you like these t-shirts. So why don't you just come over and buy one?'

I, with a slight chuckle, walked away in the opposite direction, never to see or hear of him again.

It's a weird twist of fate, not very long after I had attended the ISNA convention I had moved on from my mostly college level south-asian online community, to a very different kind of online community of Muslims. My new found community of American Muslims were a lot older and were mostly working professionals. However, this time, they were mainly Arab who, as the saying goes, were cut from a very different Arabian cloth. And which is a different post altogether, for a later time.

Now coming to the real reason behind to why I was motivated to write such a long ass post.

Recently, after so many years, I rediscovered Hijabman online. He runs a blog by the same name.

On a side note; apparently, he's into photography. He has some really nice pictures posted on his site. You might wanna check them out.

Anyhow, in the past few days I had been hearing a lot about some noteworthy report listing 500 of the most influential Muslims in the world. The list includes Arab monarchs to Tariq Ramadan to Yusuf alQardawi to Dave Chappelle  and to Shah Rukh Khan.

Yes you read it right, our very own Shah Rukh Khan is among the 500 most influential Muslims in the world.

Most of the people on the list are really well known. However, among the less known on the list, we also have my very old online acquaintance, HijabMan, aka, Javed Memon.

This is what the report has to say about him:

Javed Memon, also known as HijabMan, is a young social entrepreneur. With a website that gets 30,000 hits per day, Memon has globally launched an innovative business selling t-shirts with catchy slogans (like ‘My name causes national security alerts. What does yours do?’) after being featured on Comedy Central’s Colbert Report. ( I watch Colbert Report. How did I miss him?)

Now to think, a guy I knew but didn't think much of back when he was relatively unknown and non-existent beyond a very small group of people, would end-up as one of the 500 most influential Muslims in the world is an idea that is totally blowing my mind.

What I can't seem to wrap my head around is, for somebody who is so influential, how did I fail to notice his influence over the years?

Why did I write him off as your average Mohammed of no real influence when apparently he is among the most influential?

Over the years I have managed to spot several rising stars a lot before it became cool to know of them.

Hamza Yusuf is a case in point.

So how did I miss him? How did I not see the potential?

These are some of the question I'm going to be asking myself for a long time.

In closing, I would just like to congratulate Hijabman for making the list and would also like to say that I'm glad I knew him a lot before it became cool to know of him; despite the fact I never considered him cool enough to know.